Unless your desparate to dig around inside a DMP file, you'll likely get just as much useful information from the system event log on the system that had the BSOD, You'll get the info a lot faster ...

Gawd I feel like such a newb...what program opens .DMP files so I can read a memory dump file? I can't believe Microsoft doesn't have a built-in program to open .DMP files that it creates! or am I ...

When Windows crashes, it collects information about the crash during the time that the Crash Screen is displayed. At this point, the OS collects information from running applications, drivers, ...